Its been a long while since I've last updated this blog!

(That no one bothers to read besides myself!)

After 2 months, this week is my final week working for arvato before I go on with my poly life!

And I got my macbook for poly, and I don't like it. So MANY problems.

In addition, I'm not excited about starting my poly life at all.

I am Giant's gig was awesome and I got invited to their private bar after their gig!

There are all freaking nice guys, heres me and the singer together

Just came back from a chalet with my Montfort and St Gabs bros and it was what I needed!

A chance to escape from the fast paced, every changing world. It was exactly what I needed because I've been feeling like a fucking piece of shit for the past month before this.

A lot can happen in three years.. Change the only constant thing in life right?

Well, I hate change.

My best friends from three years ago, we used to be so tight

we didn't have to talk very often but we could understand each other very well.

Two years ago, those two moved on to their tertiary education and I stayed on

in secondary school to do my O levels. Nothing much change yet then.. but now?

For one of them, it feels that we have drifted apart so badly that now whenever

I talk to her, or rather, IF somehow I get to talk to her, it feels like I'm talking to

just some random friend I knew from back then.

For another one, it feels as if I'm not worthy enough to talk to her. Like as if her friends

are just so much more better then me now. Its still as easy to talk to her, but she constantly

drops me down.

And being me, I over think a bit too much. What's going on guys?

In addition, my brothers from secondary school too. If feels as though everyone has huge ass

egos. Everyone just much rather hang with their friends outside of school and not hang with each other or just giving himself too much self-constraint. Theres 6 of us and everyone has their own issues. One of us think that he is like the coolest amongst all, thinking everyone must accommodate to his liking, another one with huge ass attitude, one with like so pessimism and the list goes on and on. And what I hate is, no one can agree with each other and picking fights with each other. It wasn't like this back in the past. And I got a feeling, our friendship now.. Is just living on borrowed time.

I hate change, what happened to the time when we all just didn't gave a fuck and did anything and everything together? No matter what we did, where we did it, who we did it with, when we did it or how we did it. We just just did it together. Everyone is just so getting caught up with

the trends, the peer pressure from outside friends and their personal egos. I hate change so fucking much. I miss my friends, the ones from the past.

But after saying all that, maybe nothing has really changed. Maybe the one who has changed is me? Maybe everything's main reason was actually my doing. Maybe everyone just starting to treat each other different because they were afraid that I would just judge them.

Maybe because I am this guy that was the main influence of everyone to change.

If this is really true.. I'm sorry guys. Maybe my existence is just a hindrance to the way you live your life. Maybe I should just slowly just fade away from everyone.

Please guys, I hope you all read this and realise how I much hate how everyone is changing.